Sometimes relationships end because people fall out of love. Sometimes it’s the right person at the wrong time or the wrong person at the right time. Sometime’s it just doesn’t feel right. Other times one is left without really knowing the reason.
All of the above. I’ve been there. But this time I want to talk about dealbreakers.
Sometimes the right person comes along. Someone who is funny, kind, liked by your friends, the sex is great, the conversations even better, not afraid to show affection, or to plan things for the future together.
And sometimes that perfect bubble bursts when you realize that you both have a dealbreaker that completely crashes with each other.
I experienced that a little while ago. Everything was going great until it wasn’t. For a few months I was no longer the single girl, but in a weird turn of events (after a few years of errors and heartbreaks) I found myself in a relationship again. A relationship with an absolutely wonderful guy. We had so much fun together, and I missed him whenever we were apart. I guess we lived in a bubble of the starting phase of it all. As time went by though, he realized that having kids of his own was more important to him than he first thought.
This is a thing that’s a dealbreaker to me. I think kids are wonderful, and I love my son more than anything, but I can’t picture myself starting all over with a baby after so many years. I’ve written about this before, and just like I wrote then I still am 99% sure that more kids are not in the future for me.
And to continue on in a relationship with someone that truly wants kids of their own would be bitterness waiting to happen. I don’t want to put someone through that, and neither did he.
Breakups are sad, no matter how right they are. But I do want to send out a thank you to this wonderful man that I got to share my life and my thoughts with for a few months.
Opening up was hard, but you gave me hope again. Even though I opened up to something that eventually ended, I am no longer as afraid and pessimistic about love and dating, as I used to be.
You helped me out of a place where I feared love. A place where every potential someone was more of a potential heartbreak than anything else. You proved to me that there are still nice guys out there. And yes, nice boys do kiss like that!
Thank you for helping me out of the dark hole of the dating world that I had fallen into.
I wish you nothing but the best, and the woman that ends up with you will be so, so lucky!
Lots of love ❤️
Christina de Vries 