What the Freckle?

Last week I was reading the news on my way to work, and there was this piece that stood out to me. It was about a ZARA campaign with a beautiful Chinese model who had her face covered in beautiful freckles. This campaign apparently got such an amount of backlash that it ended up as news all over the world, because to most Chinese people freckles are considered ugly.

Nope, I’m not making this up! But I almost wish I was.

I know the beauty/fashion industry is filled with outdated “rules” and beauty standards, but I really thought that people, in general, were past the point where we just accepted one kind of look.

How dare some people to look at what’s natural on someone else and speak up to call it ugly? What makes them think that they have any right to?

It made me so angry, and so frustrated! Being a dedicated part of the body positive community, it’s so much more than sizes and shapes. It’s all about being happy and comfortable in the body and the beauty that we carry.

No one should ever be able to tell you that the way that you were born is the wrong kind of pretty! Let me put a truth bomb out there;

THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS THE WRONG KIND OF BEAUTY!

We all have different preferences, but that’s not the same. It’s still beauty, even if it is a kind of beauty that might not tickle your fancy. But everyone’s looks, bodies, and beauty is not made to please other people, or to allow them to voice a dislike of it.

The beauty that is you, is perfect! It’s perfect because it’s who you are! You shouldn’t be a product of what media and industries want you to be! You being here is the most perfect wonder of all!

Don’t get fooled into the lies they try to push down your throat, just for them to make more money off of insecurities. You are more than enough! You’ve always been more than enough!

You are beautiful, and I dare you to tell yourself that every single day! Every time you look in the mirror!

I’ve always loved the way the sun brings out my freckles, ever since I was a little girl!

And to the people that feel like they have a right to say that freckles are ugly, my own freckles and I would like to say; SCREW YOU, and YOU’RE WRONG! Freckles are beautiful! I even add some extra from time to time, just because I feel like my own freckles deserve a little sparkle!

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If Only We Could Replace Your Face

When I was about 14 years old, I had a crush on a guy that was my friend. We had som pretty long conversations over the phone, and I could always count on him being honest with me. I don’t remember much from all of the late night conversations we had, but there’s one conversation in particular that I will never forget. It’s the one who broke down my already battered self esteem.

I don’t remember how we got into the subject, but for some reason he told me that he’d overheard some of the guys talk about me. I asked him what they said, and at first he was reluctant to tell me. He did eventually tell me though, and in hindsight I wish he never had.

“The guys think you have a really good looking body, they just wish that they could replace your face.”

My whole life crumbled at that moment. The little self esteem a bullied 14 year old me had vanished. I remember crying in my room after my mom and the rest of the family went to bed. Sobbing as quietly as I could.

For years I only saw myself as “a body”. When I looked in the mirror I could appreciate my shape, but there were so many things I wanted to change when it came to my face. I got into modelling when I turned 18, and that made it even worse after a while. After seeing the photographers photoshop my nose smaller again and again, the complex I already had for my nose grew into a giant monster that was constantly sitting on my shoulders, whispering about how wrong my face was and how I should probably think about doing something about it.

It got to the point where I actually had booked a consultation with a plastic surgeon, but when the day came I just couldn’t bring myself to go.

I was determined to fix it one day though. For years it felt like something I really needed to do sooner or later.

Kids can be so cruel, but often they don’t know the impact their cruelty can have. And I really want to believe that they don’t know that their bullying can change peoples lives for years. The media business is a whole other story for another day.

I feel lucky that I’ve grown to love myself and the way I look. That I’ve learned to appreciate the things that makes me look different. Knowing that I wouldn’t want to live in a world where everyone looked exactly the same.

Do I still have moments where I don’t like what I see? Yes, that monster sometimes returns at weak moments and whispers things when I’m having a bad day.

Do I still want to do something about my nose? No, I have no plans of going through with rhinoplasty. This is the nose that my parents gave me, and this is who I’m supposed to be.

Self love is something that’s very important to me, and something that I’ve written and talked about several times. It’s something we all need to practice more and help each other out with. Self love can be a tough exercise, but we all need to do it and do it more often!

I’m currently taking notes for a few self love videos that I’m hoping to make this fall. I’m excited to be working on something that’s so important to me, and I look forward to sharing it with you guys!

Love yourself and share your love!

My Pale Skin – You Look Disgusting

When I first saw this video it made me want to cry! The second time I got angry! And as I’m sharing it would you guys I’m both with a sprinkle of motivation and inspiration on top! We need to change the way we talk to each other and don’t even get me started on internet trolls! I’ll save that for a later post.

Watch this and go forth as a great example when you travel through the world wide web.

SPREAD LOVE, NOT HATE!

 

Plus Size Models and Body Image

Earlier this week I read an article that covered the fact that plus size model Tess Holliday had signed a modeling contract with a big agency, being the first in her size to do so.

Ppl forget that I'm a person. Why is it ok to diminish how hard I've worked my entire life & pushed against great odds because of my size?

— Tess H🍒lliday (@Tess_Holliday) January 30, 2015

I’ve been following Tess on social media for a loong time and I did a celebration dance when I heard this fantastic news!

 

I think it is so important that we start to see the lovely beauties of different sizes doing their thing! Tess is an absolute fox and the work that she does with trying to help other girls to be proud of the body that they have through her EffYourBeautyStandards is amazing and so important! The media has taught us girls to hate our bodies if it does not fit into the size that they have decided is the right one. We are bombarded with commercials, movies, music videos etc. that shows us bodies that are photoshopped to someone other than that person who actually stood in front of the camera.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that this isn’t the case for everyone. Not all of them are twisted versions of the truth but there’s no secret that way too many are! It’s time for a change and that change has been very much needed for way too long! And I think that women like Tess is a big part of that change (no pun intended)!

So when I was done doing my dance I looked for any cover of this story in Norwegian newspapers, and sure enough, there it was! Hurray!! But then I made the fatal mistake of reading the reader’s comments below and it made me so sad and angry.

Most of the people who posted comments agreed that it is a good thing that we are seeing models who’s got some meat on their bones, but then the rants came. How Tess is an unhealthy role model for young girls. How they think that it is irresponsible to show “fat” women because that will make young girls think that it is healthy to be obese/fat.

“This is the counterpart of starved and anorectic! We need healthy role models for our kids, not this!!”

 

Really? Is this really what people are taking from these great news? Let me set the records straight right now!

The focus on this news is not what size she is! Does who follow Tess will also know that she does work out and is healthy but has always been a big girl. She was bullied out of school as a young girl and never thought that she would be a model even though she really wanted to.

So all of you with all of that negativity out there, throwing it around like you just don’t care: What makes you any better than does bullies? Haven’t we grown past that yet? Shame on you!

So when you’ve maybe gotten that through your head then tell me this: Are you comfortable in your own body?

I hope you are, because we should all be! We always find things that we would like to improve, and that’s fine, but do it for you! NOT for anyone else. A size zero won’t make you happy!

The important message that Tess is all about is redefining the standards of beauty. To love oneself and letting go of does stupid ideals that’s been pushed down our throats for way to long. To stop the bullying and to see the beauty that is in us all. To reach for the stars and follow our dreams no matter what other people say!

So I say: YOU GO TESS!! I’m rooting for you!!!

 

Let’s shake it off and chase those dreams!!

Confessions of a Ginger

Being a ginger is awesome! I love it! I’m proud of it!
But there was a time when I wasn’t.

Being an unsecure teenager was tough. Being a bullied one was even worse. There are some things that are quite different when it comes to us gingers and the bullies have a talent for finding those little things and using them against the ones who are bullied.
One of the things I heard a lot of comments on was my pale skin. I didn’t get a tan like all “the pretty, popular girls”. My skin has pretty much the same color all year round and even when everyone else complains about being pale I can usually beat them all if it were a competition.

The freckles were pointed out as well and there was a time when I hated to be different. I just wanted to look like everyone else. Wanted to fit in. I wanted the bullies to not have anything to pick on.
The bullies came and then they went. I grew older and somewhat wiser (I’m still working on that part). Then something amazing happened. I started to love all the things about me that were different. I found that being different makes you stand out and that can be a great thing! And when you look into the science of gingers it is pretty awesome!

Did you know that we are mutants?
Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters here I come!! The gene that causes red hair, which is recessive, comes from the MC1R, which is a genetic mutation.

We produce our own Vitamin D!
The pigmentation of our skin allows us to absorb a lot more sunlight on the days where there is hardly any and this increases our own production of Vitamin D! Maybe this is why I never got depressed during the dark days of winter??

Gingers don’t go grey!
Our hair usually doesn’t go grey with age. It goes from red to blonde and then to white! I’ll braid mine, run around and sing “Let it go” when I get older.

Ancient Greeks actually thought we were vampires!
Gingers do have souls, I’m pretty sure of it! But the truth is that the ancient Greeks thought that when Gingers died they turned into vampires!

Want to guess the rarest combination of hair and eye color?!
Ding ding ding!!! Red hair and blue eyes! This combination makes up only 1% of the entire planets population!

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So there it is and here I am! I’m a ginger. I get sunburnt easily, I need a lot more anesthetic than other people for it to work, I have pale skin and freckles. These are all details about me that I have because I am ginger.
With confidence comes love! With love comes beauty! And no matter what hair color you have, you should rock it! Your uniqueness is what makes you perfect in every single way! We need to stop striving for some ideal beauty. How boring wouldn’t the world be if we all looked the same?

Be you!
Lots of ginger hugs from me to all of you!!

Transfixed by Beauty

Boys and girls and geeks of all ages!! A new video has been released by Shots of Awe and it’s just as gorgeous as the others!

How often do you find yourself transfixed by beauty? I feel incredibly lucky to be able to find beauty in the weirdest things in this world. I use a lot of these moments in my writing. To be able to look at the things that might seem ordinary to a lot of people can be the most beautiful and amazing things.

To watch the details in a snowflake can bring tears to my eyes and make me all warm and fuzzy. This world that we live in, the life that we lead is such an amazing thing.

We’re not always happy and it’s not always sunshine and rainbows but in sorrow and hard times there is also a kind of beauty. It’s about how we choose to see life and to live it.

Sit back, press play and enjoy!

It is time for a change!

Are you aware of how the media affects how so many of us think? How we look at ourselves? And how we look at others?

What does our future look like if we are not willing to open our eyes and look at the way our world is functioning at this moment? And how are we going to change it?

Take a look at growing up today. So much of what we learn comes from television and the Internet. And how are women being portrayed in these channels?

As little girls we grow up with Barbie dolls, Disney princesses and teenage movies with picture perfect Hollywood stars. We are brought up to believe that being perfect is looking like the girls/women we see in the media. You are not allowed to look different, to be different and to stand up for it.

We focus a lot on how men makes women feel less valued and objectified. This is of course a real problem and I’m not trying to say that it isn’t. But the thing is that I think girls pick up this bullying through media a lot earlier than the boys.

Women wants to be strong and we want to be equal but we do in some way just accept that this isn’t how the world is today. We don’t believe that we have that strength inside of us to fight for our equal rights.

“Let someone else fight for it!”

A lot of the feminists that we’ve seen are the ones who doesn’t really fight for equality but instead they fight for some sort of world where women take the places that the men have today. That is not a healthy way to go at it either.

It is as easy as this.

–       The person who is most qualified for the job should be the one to get it, no matter what their gender is.

–       If a woman does the same job and has the same responsibilities as a man, there is no sane reason for that woman to get paid less than the man.

Shouldn’t this be pretty clear to everyone and anyone?

The other thing that has to be said about women which I started mentioning a little earlier in this post is the bullying and scrutiny that women tend to do to other women. We don’t want to be objectified and valued because of our looks but we do the very same thing towards other women. How is this ever going to change if we can’t change it in ourselves?

We need to stop picking on others for how they look. Because for us to feel accepted as individuals we have to accept the others for what they are; Individuals.

We need to remember that the picture perfect women we see in the media aren’t real. They are in the media for solely one reason; money. Not the women, but the companies using them in their adverts, tv shows and so on. There is an exploding industry making an insane amount of money because of insecurity. Plastic surgery, clothes, makeup etc.

We are taught that looking a certain way is the only option and that is where we need to put our foot down.

Dress up for you, no one else. Put on that makeup because you want to, not because you feel like you have to. And don’t let anyone make you feel that you can’t achieve your dreams because of your gender. Everything in life is half chanced, and that is the same for everyone.

Make it or break it, aim for the top no matter how impossible anyone might tell you it is.

We need female leaders, female voices and female faces. We need more role models for young girls!

Embrace your beauty and be proud of who you are!

We don’t have to accept things as they are when it is so obvious that they need to change!