With No Shame!

The photo is by the wonderful Thomas Amdahl 😊 Check out his Instagram here!

Isn’t it weird how the most natural part of us, the bodies that we are born in, are causing us so much anxiety, stress, and insecurity? How often do we look at it and think that it’s not good enough? How many times have we made plans and changes in our lifestyles just to alter our human form? How often have we compared ourselves to others? And how many of these times were we actually comparing our real bodies with those that are manipulated and unrealistic?

We grow up watching picture perfect bodies and faces and come to expect ourselves to meet those standards. We let ourselves be fooled into thinking that the fiction and manipulation that we see every day is in fact real.

It’s so unhealthy and we are all victims of the crime of doing it. Some way more than others.

And in the midst of all the fake, so many have become uncomfortable with their bodies and about nudity. They see it as something that’s filthy and offensive. This wonderful and natural thing that embodies our souls has been corrupted in the minds of its own beholders.

We should be able to talk more openly about our bodies, with no shame. We should be able to be proud of the skin we are in, with no shame. We should be grateful for the gift that it is, and what it allows us to do, with no shame.

It’s so wonderful to see that more and more fashion brands are choosing to use models of different colors, shapes, and sizes. That people so clearly has had enough of being fooled, discriminated, underrepresented, and deceived. The demand for real bodies and real images of those bodies are being heard, and it makes me so happy!

We have a long way to go though, but I think we have to start with getting a healthy relationship with our own bodies. We have to be grateful for what it can do. We have to fall in love with it and take good care of it, and yes sometimes that means just staying in bed and eat ice cream. Being good to ourselves and to love our bodies isn’t always about working out or eating super healthy. It’s also about allowing oneself to indulge and to enjoy. To not be so mean to ourselves. To find that childlike joy and curiosity in exploring our bodies.

So take the time to get to know your body. Be proud of the body that you have, even though you might be on a journey with it. Be mindful of the transformations and the senses.

Love yourself, with no shame ❤️

One Comment – Years of Insecurity

I started doing a bit of work in front of the camera right after I’d turned 18. It was exciting and different. It was a new way for me to be creative, but also a way to experience other people’s creativity.

Even though I did enjoy most of the modeling work that I did do back in the day, I do see a major difference on how I approached it back then and now.

I remember very well how it felt the first time a photographer told me that a certain company didn’t want to use me because I was too fair skinned. They wanted typical tanned Norwegian girls, and I did not fall into that category. It wasn’t a huge blow to my confidence, but I remember feeling it a little bit still.

There was another moment though, and that is one that I remember very clearly. I did an ad piece for a Norwegian shopping mall, and when the pictures were sent to me I was shocked to see that the face staring back at me was not one that I really recognized.

“I edited your face a little. Made your nose smaller and your eyes a little bigger.”

I had been struggling with insecurities about my nose for a long time, and I remember that as a point where it escalated, and every time I would look in a mirror all I would see was this big thing that was smack in the middle of my face.

It went as far as me booking a consultation with a plastic surgeon for a possible rhinoplasty, which by the way is a horrible name for that job! As if the people who reach out and consider doing something about their nose aren’t insecure enough about that part already!

I never went to the appointment, and slowly over time, I learned to love myself for who I am and what I got. Sometimes I still get really self-conscious about my nose, but it doesn’t overwhelm me like it used to.

Some people are so oblivious to the impact their words and their actions can have on other people’s lives. It’s frightening!

It took a lot of practice to learn self-love, and it’s something that I think is important to constantly work on. Our bodies change all the time, but it’s so important to be grateful. I have legs that walk, hands that can hold, arms that can hug, lips that can kiss and taste, a nose that can smell the things around me, eyes that see, no illnesses or allergies, and no pain in my everyday life. I’m so insanely lucky, and for many years I had a hard time focusing on that.

I was also incredibly lucky to get to work with some amazing photographers through the years that have helped me build my confidence and self-love instead of tearing it apart. People who make art because they love it, not because they want to make something that just fits into a certain box that is requested.

I am also very lucky to have grown up in families that are very body positive. Parents that have a very healthy relationship with their body and with nudity. Surrounded by people who were supportive and loving. If that hadn’t been a part of my upbringing, I’m not sure I would’ve coped as well with the comments and the insecurities that I’ve struggled with.

I also have amazing friends and we compliment each other all the time❤️ That’s something we always have and always will be doing!

I don’t work with photographers as often anymore, but it happens from time to time. I do however really enjoy taking my own pictures and doing my own editing in PhotoShop. But even though I love to play around with the editing, there is one thing that I’ve promised myself, and that is to never alter the look of my face or my body. I play around with colors and textures, and I might remove a pimple from time to time, but other than that I think it’s important to be true to oneself and to not let oneself be defined by fake reality.

My son will be a teenager in just a couple of years (I know!? Yikes!!) and I want him to grow up seeing real girls and real women being portrayed in movies, photos, and ads. I want him to appreciate real beauty and real human beings. And that does not apply to just women of course! I want him to grow up in a world where people are shown as the wonderful, fantastic, amazing and confusing creatures that we are.

I want him to have a healthy relationship with himself and his own body. To see the real beauty in the people around him, instead of searching for some unrealistic ideal of a human.

We all have the power to do something, and I think most of it starts with loving yourself. Find that self-love and that gratitude, and practice it as much as you can! Then go out into the world as a good example. Share the love and the gratitude!

And most importantly, don’t let anyone tell you that you’re not good enough! I know it’s hard, and I struggle alongside you, but the truth is that they have no right to tell you so! They have no right to try to define you or to change you. Set boundaries and don’t be afraid to let them be heard!

You are amazing and beautiful, no matter if some idiot(s) have told you differently!

And if you ever need a reminder of how awesome you are, then I am here! I will try my very best to share my love and my gratitude with you ❤️

☼

 Photo is by the wonderful and talented Isidoro Peregrino💛

It Feels Good

Whenever I feel a little down or out of sorts, I struggle to find the motivation to workout. I know that I’m not alone in this, and for the last few months, my mood has been very up and down, so I fell out of my good routines. Now I’m finally starting to get back on track with it all and it feels so good!

And the thing that I’ve really come to realize when getting back into it this time around, is just how much I need that workout whenever I’m not quite feeling like my happy go lucky self. That is the time when it feels the very best to actually get down on that mat and build up a good dose of endorphins. It’s whenever I feel the least like working out that I probably need it the most!

So for a little while now I’ve been really pushing myself to get back into working out, and especially when I don’t feel motivated to do so. It’s been hard as hell at times. I’ve really had to push myself to get into those workout clothes and ready to sweat it out.

Some days, I’ve done relaxed yoga, and other days I’ve really pushed myself to the limit. And now finally, the routine has started to stick. Now it feels like it’s a part of my everyday life again, and I look forward to getting my workout done pretty much (saying every single one would be a lie) every day.

I can’t wait to see more progress and to get back into shape again! And as soon as the snow disappears (which feels like a possible eternity now, here in Norway) I will get back into running again as well 😊

It’s important to take care of both our bodies and minds, and we all do that in different ways! Every little bit helps, but the most important practice is loving ourselves for who we are❤️ So if you don’t find the time or the motivation to exercise your body or your mind, remember to at least exercise your self-love! You deserve it ❤️

If Only We Could Replace Your Face

When I was about 14 years old, I had a crush on a guy that was my friend. We had som pretty long conversations over the phone, and I could always count on him being honest with me. I don’t remember much from all of the late night conversations we had, but there’s one conversation in particular that I will never forget. It’s the one who broke down my already battered self esteem.

I don’t remember how we got into the subject, but for some reason he told me that he’d overheard some of the guys talk about me. I asked him what they said, and at first he was reluctant to tell me. He did eventually tell me though, and in hindsight I wish he never had.

“The guys think you have a really good looking body, they just wish that they could replace your face.”

My whole life crumbled at that moment. The little self esteem a bullied 14 year old me had vanished. I remember crying in my room after my mom and the rest of the family went to bed. Sobbing as quietly as I could.

For years I only saw myself as “a body”. When I looked in the mirror I could appreciate my shape, but there were so many things I wanted to change when it came to my face. I got into modelling when I turned 18, and that made it even worse after a while. After seeing the photographers photoshop my nose smaller again and again, the complex I already had for my nose grew into a giant monster that was constantly sitting on my shoulders, whispering about how wrong my face was and how I should probably think about doing something about it.

It got to the point where I actually had booked a consultation with a plastic surgeon, but when the day came I just couldn’t bring myself to go.

I was determined to fix it one day though. For years it felt like something I really needed to do sooner or later.

Kids can be so cruel, but often they don’t know the impact their cruelty can have. And I really want to believe that they don’t know that their bullying can change peoples lives for years. The media business is a whole other story for another day.

I feel lucky that I’ve grown to love myself and the way I look. That I’ve learned to appreciate the things that makes me look different. Knowing that I wouldn’t want to live in a world where everyone looked exactly the same.

Do I still have moments where I don’t like what I see? Yes, that monster sometimes returns at weak moments and whispers things when I’m having a bad day.

Do I still want to do something about my nose? No, I have no plans of going through with rhinoplasty. This is the nose that my parents gave me, and this is who I’m supposed to be.

Self love is something that’s very important to me, and something that I’ve written and talked about several times. It’s something we all need to practice more and help each other out with. Self love can be a tough exercise, but we all need to do it and do it more often!

I’m currently taking notes for a few self love videos that I’m hoping to make this fall. I’m excited to be working on something that’s so important to me, and I look forward to sharing it with you guys!

Love yourself and share your love!