Let’s Talk About Changes

Or rather the constant change in our bodies. I’ve gone through some ups and downs when it comes to weight. I went through pregnancy at age 19, and a whole lot of changes happen through that time, and for a while after as well. I’ve had periods of time where I’ve been quite fit, and then some when I have been “just slim”.

It’s a weird thing how we look at ourselves so differently through our changes, but also how we perceive ourselves through the the changes in our lives. If I’m having a shitty day, I very rarely look at myself in the mirror and think “But damn! At least I look good!”

Our moods and our feelings shines through with our body language. And it never fails that the days where I feel good and grateful, those are the days where the unexpected compliments suddenly make their appearances.

I’ve been noticing a few new changes in my body over the last weeks, mostly because I’ve been focusing on taking better care of both my body and my mind. And I think it’s important to think about how removing toxic elements from your life can make just as much of a difference to your confidence as removing the toxic food that will show healthy changes in your body.

To be clear, I’m not talking about dieting. I’m talking about being mindful about what you put into your body.

Our bodies and our minds are so fascinating and wonderful in so many ways. It’s about time we started to treat both as they deserve. And I know it’s not always easy. Toxic elements have a funny way of sneaking up on us and hang around for way longer than we should’ve allowed them. But the more we focus on body positivity, healthy lifestyle and making good changes, the easier it will be to love yourself and to make good choices!

Love your body and your mind enough to take good care of both, and be mindful through the changes ❤️

With No Shame!

The photo is by the wonderful Thomas Amdahl 😊 Check out his Instagram here!

Isn’t it weird how the most natural part of us, the bodies that we are born in, are causing us so much anxiety, stress, and insecurity? How often do we look at it and think that it’s not good enough? How many times have we made plans and changes in our lifestyles just to alter our human form? How often have we compared ourselves to others? And how many of these times were we actually comparing our real bodies with those that are manipulated and unrealistic?

We grow up watching picture perfect bodies and faces and come to expect ourselves to meet those standards. We let ourselves be fooled into thinking that the fiction and manipulation that we see every day is in fact real.

It’s so unhealthy and we are all victims of the crime of doing it. Some way more than others.

And in the midst of all the fake, so many have become uncomfortable with their bodies and about nudity. They see it as something that’s filthy and offensive. This wonderful and natural thing that embodies our souls has been corrupted in the minds of its own beholders.

We should be able to talk more openly about our bodies, with no shame. We should be able to be proud of the skin we are in, with no shame. We should be grateful for the gift that it is, and what it allows us to do, with no shame.

It’s so wonderful to see that more and more fashion brands are choosing to use models of different colors, shapes, and sizes. That people so clearly has had enough of being fooled, discriminated, underrepresented, and deceived. The demand for real bodies and real images of those bodies are being heard, and it makes me so happy!

We have a long way to go though, but I think we have to start with getting a healthy relationship with our own bodies. We have to be grateful for what it can do. We have to fall in love with it and take good care of it, and yes sometimes that means just staying in bed and eat ice cream. Being good to ourselves and to love our bodies isn’t always about working out or eating super healthy. It’s also about allowing oneself to indulge and to enjoy. To not be so mean to ourselves. To find that childlike joy and curiosity in exploring our bodies.

So take the time to get to know your body. Be proud of the body that you have, even though you might be on a journey with it. Be mindful of the transformations and the senses.

Love yourself, with no shame ❤️

Body Loving by Christina de Vries – POEM

When was the last time

You looked in the mirror and said 

I love this body of mine?

*

When there was nothing you’d like to change

Nothing to improve or work with

When you didn’t compare yourself to strangers?

*

Ask me. The honest answer is 

I can’t even remember 

And scary enough, I’m not alone in this

*

Thrown at us from every direction is the guide

Wanting people to become unrealistic creatures

Wanting us to show it all, but makes us hide

*

Creating a dream to become something unreal

To try to get results only photoshop can make

And when you don’t get there, what do you feel?

*

The shame of not being good enough

Some break down because of failing 

There’s only so long a person can act tough

*

I don’t love my body. I wish that wasn’t true

How perfect it would be to only see 

The miracle that makes me and you

*

Think of all this wonderful body can do 

It heals itself, loves and handle pain 

Let’s stop the shaming and say thank you

*

Thank you for letting me feel 

For taking me places and creating memories

For being something to be proud of and not conceal

*

It’s time to focus on getting better from the inside

Using time well spent by giving out a compliment

And stop judging on what is on the outside

*

Learn to see the beauty of a broken soul

To love all that makes us human 

Appreciate the mistakes that makes us whole

*

Body shaming is just another word for hate

And why should we talk down about 

The one thing keeping us grounded, unique and great?

*

It’s long overdue to turn body shaming into body loving 

To take care of it as our most important asset

Because without it, we truly are nothing 

*

You might never see perfection but love it anyway 

For all it gives you and where it takes you

Repeat after me and say:

*

I love my body!

I love my body!

I LOVE MY BODY!

*

Scream it to the world so they can all hear

Write it in the sky and at the bottom of the sea

With those four words, chase away the fear

*

Of never becoming a copy of a lie

Embrace that miracle that is you 

And kiss those body shamers goodbye

*

Life is too precious and too short for shame

Take a break. It’s time to love yourself

Besides, how stupid would we look if we were all the same?

*

©Christina de Vries – Geek Heaven

Confessions of a Ginger

Being a ginger is awesome! I love it! I’m proud of it!
But there was a time when I wasn’t.

Being an unsecure teenager was tough. Being a bullied one was even worse. There are some things that are quite different when it comes to us gingers and the bullies have a talent for finding those little things and using them against the ones who are bullied.
One of the things I heard a lot of comments on was my pale skin. I didn’t get a tan like all “the pretty, popular girls”. My skin has pretty much the same color all year round and even when everyone else complains about being pale I can usually beat them all if it were a competition.

The freckles were pointed out as well and there was a time when I hated to be different. I just wanted to look like everyone else. Wanted to fit in. I wanted the bullies to not have anything to pick on.
The bullies came and then they went. I grew older and somewhat wiser (I’m still working on that part). Then something amazing happened. I started to love all the things about me that were different. I found that being different makes you stand out and that can be a great thing! And when you look into the science of gingers it is pretty awesome!

Did you know that we are mutants?
Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters here I come!! The gene that causes red hair, which is recessive, comes from the MC1R, which is a genetic mutation.

We produce our own Vitamin D!
The pigmentation of our skin allows us to absorb a lot more sunlight on the days where there is hardly any and this increases our own production of Vitamin D! Maybe this is why I never got depressed during the dark days of winter??

Gingers don’t go grey!
Our hair usually doesn’t go grey with age. It goes from red to blonde and then to white! I’ll braid mine, run around and sing “Let it go” when I get older.

Ancient Greeks actually thought we were vampires!
Gingers do have souls, I’m pretty sure of it! But the truth is that the ancient Greeks thought that when Gingers died they turned into vampires!

Want to guess the rarest combination of hair and eye color?!
Ding ding ding!!! Red hair and blue eyes! This combination makes up only 1% of the entire planets population!

***

So there it is and here I am! I’m a ginger. I get sunburnt easily, I need a lot more anesthetic than other people for it to work, I have pale skin and freckles. These are all details about me that I have because I am ginger.
With confidence comes love! With love comes beauty! And no matter what hair color you have, you should rock it! Your uniqueness is what makes you perfect in every single way! We need to stop striving for some ideal beauty. How boring wouldn’t the world be if we all looked the same?

Be you!
Lots of ginger hugs from me to all of you!!

You don’t have to try so hard!

The first time I showed this song to one of my girlfriends she was in tear. I had the exact same reaction when I heard it the first time.

Now I would like to share it with you guys!

We use so much energy on trying to fit in, to look the way that the media tell us is the right way, to be popular and to be loved.

How easy it is to get caught up in it all. To find out one day that even though there are so many other people who likes you, you don’t really like yourself. We need to stop trying to be what everyone else wants us to be and focus on becoming the one that we would like to be.

You need to love yourself before anyone else can possibly love you for the one that you truly are.

Watch, listen and enjoy!

Hi! My Name is Christina and I am a Confident Introvert!

Throughout life I’ve been through several different stages with my personality. For some time as a very young girl I could run up to strangers and talk and talk and talk. I even fell asleep in the laps of an old couple I met on the train once. I only remember bits and pieces of this and can’t say for sure how long it lasted or what it was that happened for it to change. Because it did change. I can remember starting in first grade, all excited and willing to learn anything and everything they threw at me, but this is when my thoughts started to wander. I would find myself staring out of the window. Looking at the wind dancing with the trees, the clouds making faces and the weather changing from sun to rain to snow and back to sun again. I was the the princess of daydreaming, and every student-teacher-parent meeting we went to they always said the same thing:

‘Christina is very smart. She does what she is told and usually gets it right most of the times. She is a very good student, although she should try to raise her hand and give answers out loud more often. Oh, and she has a habit of staring out of the window, daydreaming.’

I guess some things never change. I don’t think I could stop it even if my life depended on it.

I had friends in school, not many but the ones I had were amazing. My dear friend Kirsti has been my best friend from way back then, into the now and I’m guessing to infinity and beyond. But when it was time to switch to high school, my best friend moved and started at another school than mine.

I found a few really good friends at my new school, but those three years are the years where I got pretty shy in many ways. Bullying does that to a person. I wasn’t the worst case, but none the less there were more nights crying in my bed room than it should have been. Good friendships, family and the pen and paper got me through it. A while back I took the time to flip through the notebooks I had back then and it was covered with stories and poems where there should have been math and French. My grades were good and I still liked the learning process, I just wished that I could experience it in an environment where being shy and hold back felt like the best option.

Something changed AGAIN when I got to be about sixteen. The bullying had scarred me but it also built character that I am grateful for today.  I started my adventure into adulthood and as for most of us it had its bumps and cracks. Little by little I got to know who I am and who I want to be. I learned how to be comfortable in my own skin and wanting to help others feel the same about them. I found a positive person inside of me that had been hiding in a corner for too long and I nourished her and we grew as one and we are still do! I found the writer in me again and again, but it wasn’t until very recent years that I had the guts to pursue it. I’ve said that I’m going to be a writer since I was around five years old, but this time right here is the time that I finally dare to say;

I’M A WRITER!

Even though my novel isn’t done yet, writing isn’t something that I choose to do anymore. It is something that I have to do!

Going on that journey from sixteen till now there has been a lot of changes, and I’ve met some truly amazing people along the way. I’ve broken out of my shell and I’ve found the pleasure and excitement of challenging myself and all that I know. To go out on adventures and find those tiny or grand things that makes our lives, our short time on this earth so incredibly amazing. I started to label myself as an extrovert.

A while back I read a book called “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop talking” by Susan Cain and how I saw myself changed after this.

Society has taught us that we have to be outgoing extroverts if we want to become anything in life and we take their word for it. We write exactly that about ourselves on our resumes, our dating profile and we tell it to ourselves. But what I discovered reading this book was something completely different.

As I read more in depth about what being an introvert really means I found that I was a perfect fit for a confident introvert. I’m not afraid of talking to strangers, but I always carefully weigh the words that I’m going to say. I like being out and around people at the same time as I love the moments that I have to myself. These are just a couple of many things I recognized in myself while reading this book, and even though I was a little shocked at first I’m very happy about it now.

Did you know that introverts usually are the best leaders? Something to think about, right?

I’m not going to sit here and say that being this or that is better than the other. I know a lot of very extroverted people that I find truly fascinating and amazing, and the same goes for those who are shy introverts as well. It’s not really about labels, it’s about being comfortable in your skin. To know who you are and to love yourself for it!

Hi! My Name is Christina and I am a Confident Introvert! 

Now, tell me about YOU!

You find yourself through amazing friends! Like these lovely ladies!! Love you guys!!

 

Do you want to read Susan Cain’s book? Buy it on Amazon HERE 🙂 

4 Days.. 6 Years.. Who cares??

The big talk these past days here in Norway has been about blogger Caroline Berg Eriksen’s post on instagram. She posted this picture four days after giving birth to her first child:

I didn’t really think much about it other than being slightly surprised thinking back to how my body looked four days after I gave birth to Leander.
Then the reactions came in huge waves. The media picked up on it and it really has gotten way more attention than necessarybfl from my point of view.
Some congratulate her on being fit and healthy throughout the pregnancy and others are screaming louder than ever about her being a bad rolemodel for young girls.

So what do I think?
I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to write about this at all, but as the double standard from all the screamers just grew and grew, I couldn’t just let this pass.

Why is it that when a curvy woman shows off her body she is considered confident, beautiful and a good role model, but when someone who is naturally skinny and not having any eating disorder does the same thing then people start screaming about it being wrong??

I know several girls who are naturally skinny like she is. They don’t have eating disorders, they exercise to keep healthy and they eat healthy because they care about what they put into their bodies. Why is this suddenly a bad role model? Just because we think about the catwalk models when we see them?

I write a lot about having confidence in our selves and to love the body that we live in. And this does apply to skinny people as well curvy ones. There aren’t any restrictions to this! The important thing is to take care of your own body and to find that confidence within you.

Is there bad role models for young girls out there? Hell yes!
Is Caroline one of them? Not really..
Bodies are different. People are different. And from what I’ve seen of her blog and read about her she seems like an active and healthy person. And she also has a certain body type and genes to follow that makes her naturally skinny. So why shouldn’t she be able to be proud of her body just as much as a curvy woman??

Do you see the double standard here??!?

So why do we fuzz and scream about this?? How about focusing on ourselves instead of pointing our fingers at everyone and everything else. Let us love the body that we’re in, focus on being healthy but also enjoying life and to share our good thoughts and compliments with other people.

My body, six years after giving birth.
What’s the point?
Four days? Six years? The point is that there really isn’t any reason to scream and shout about it. It’s just a body! Let us love the one we got and accept others as well.

Stop the double standard! Be proud of your body!