I moved on, but there’s still love.

After the pain of a breakup or a fallout from a relationship, whether it’s a longterm one or “just” dating for a while, there will come times where the pain will resurface.

Moving on doesn’t mean that you stop loving the person. For me, when I move on from a relationship where there’s been love involved, the love doesn’t necessarily go away. I think that true love, for both lovers and friends, means that you want the best for that person, no matter if that involves you or not. And in the cases of unrequited love especially, there’s that part of me that wants nothing but happiness for the other person even though it hurts like hell knowing that I won’t be a part of that happiness.

Time heals, but after the moving on from what ended, it can still be painful to watch the lover of the past move on with someone else. To see that look in their eyes that used to be so familiar, being sent someone else’s way can be hard. To know that the fingers that used to intertwine with yours are now getting to know the feel of another hand. That the lips you used to kiss are kissed by someone else. It can feel a bit like ripping up an old wound. It’s kind of like looking at a mirror that’s just off. One that shows part of what you remember and also part of what you thought the future would look like.

A little while ago I experienced just that. I was the witness of someone that was a big part of my life obviously moving on with someone new. They looked so happy together. They looked like there was no one else in the world but the two of them.

As I looked at them I was so happy for the two, but I also felt like something split open inside of me. I felt a whole range of emotions in such a short period of time, and I was completely overwhelmed and unprepared for it.

So, I did what I normally do when I encounter moments where I find myself a bit lost. I took time to myself, both alone and with people that I love and trust. I was very mindful of everything I felt. I wrote, a lot. And I processed.

I don’t have the answers to why we feel like we do, or what the right path to go is, but here’s where my thoughts gathered:

Even though I moved on, there’s still love.

Even though there’s still love, doesn’t mean that I want you back.

Even though I don’t want you back, I want you to be happy. 

And even though I’m happy for you, it still might hurt.

All the best, that’s my wish for you, and for me❤️


They Don’t Get to Decide This!

Throughout our lives, we will meet selfish people and invite them into our lives before they show their true self. People who think that everything revolves around them. That the spotlight shines for them, and them alone. People who think that they can dance their way into your life whenever it suits them, stomp all over your heart, leave again, and then suddenly pop up again when it’s most convenient for them, taking no consideration as to how that fits into your life.

Why do we let them? Because we care about them. We care and love them so much more than they probably deserve. That is why it’s so hard to let go. That is why we hold on to the point where it strangles us instead of them.

I’ve been through that a couple of times in my life, and even though it’s shitty to go through no matter how many times you have to do it, it gets easier somehow. It’s easier to see through all of the bullshit. You might still give them the benefit of the doubt, but still a bit more cautiously than before.

It’s totally fine to be protective of your heart. Let the selfish ones teach you what to look for, but don’t let their mistakes make you close off to love.

You are worthy of all the love and respect! Don’t let the selfish ones decide who you spend time on. Don’t let them in if they don’t have good intentions. Don’t share your spotlight if they don’t have enough space in theirs for you. Letting go can be so hard to do, but it’s okay for you to be selfish when comes to cutting negativity out of your life, and protecting your heart!

Love yourself enough to know when it’s time to move on, and don’t beat yourself up for not having done so sooner. It changes nothing, and it’s not worth your time or your energy❤️

Your heart and your soul deserves better ❤️

Love you guys❤️


Still Waiting ● POEM

Heart in hand

She is still waiting

For the day his name

Will feel misplaced 

On her lips

When other kisses

Will not be compared

To his

When the city presents

New beginnings

Not just reminders

Of the lost

For the time to come

When she can finally

Move on

©Christina de Vries